Sunday, September 20, 2015

Hair Loss

On Friday, I tentatively washed my hair, being very careful with it.  I lost a little more than normal, but I was being very careful with it.   I didn't comb it, using my fingers to arrange and separate my curls.  As I noticed it breaking and coming out, I knew it was time.  I called Marsha, my good friend who has done my hair for almost 30 years.   I told her it was time.   She said she was free all weekend and to give her a call when I was ready.

I had invited my two beautiful granddaughters, Ryleigh and Keighley, (10 & 9) to spend the night with me on Saturday night and I told them that they could cut my hair.   Their eyes twinkled and sparkled at the thought of it!  LOL  I knew that having them there would make me be strong and not cry.  

They came after their cheerleading on Saturday and we had a ball.  They chip chopped on my hair for about 20 minutes, creating a very unique style.  We laughed and giggled and it did my heart good.  Marsha came about an hour later, and she finished the job off.  I discovered that I have a very nicely shaped head, if I don't say so myself.  No big bumps or flat spots.  However, it's not a look I would CHOOSE to have, but it is a look I will have for awhile while I kick cancer's a$#.

It was empowering to get it off.  I had had such high anxiety over the past few days over my hair.  Yesterday, I felt in control.  I decided when this was happening, not this horrible disease that is trying to kill me - and it will FAIL miserably, I might add!  It has taken my hair, but it is on my terms.

On a PLUS note, I haven't shaved my legs in 3 weeks and they are as smooth as can be!  Some with my underarms.  Now, if that pesky hair that I keep plucking off my chin would follow suit, I will be a happy girl!

I'm not going to lie, I woke up this morning, looked in the mirror and burst out in tears.  I'm going to allow it, for a bit, today.  It didn't last long.  Keighley woke up and I wiped the tears away and gave her a hug and a kiss and we are watching The Chronicles of Narnia.  Today is the LAST DAY I will shed tears for my hair.  LAST DAY!!!   It is a small price to pay for my life, and it isn't important in the long run.

Stay well, my friends, and thanks for coming on this journey with me!

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